6 Easy Tips for Setting Boundaries Around Your Craft

One of the hardest things to do in life is to create boundaries around our passions. This is especially true when our passion becomes our source of income. There is often a huge goal we have set around it–like winning an Oscar or Olivier award. This puts pressure around our craft and suddenly, something that used to bring us pure joy and flow becomes the source of our stress.

This can often lead to a lack of boundaries around our craft. Suddenly we find those evasive song lyrics keeping us up at night, or that piece we are writing causes us to forget to eat. What was once a healthy passion becomes an unhealthy obsession.

This can lead to resentment of our craft, anxiety, depression and burnout. It can cause us to forget why we even fell in love with our craft in the first place. If you are finding yourself increasingly in this place, here are some practical ways to set boundaries around your craft so you can find the balance between striving and enjoyment.

Set a time limit around your craft–and stick to it

Decide how much time you will commit to your craft each day and commit to it. Get clear on what time you will start and what time you will finish. When it is time to start, eliminate all distractions so you are giving it your full focus. When the time comes to stop, really stop. Set an alarm if you have to, or entrust a friend to hold you accountable. Decide if you will dedicate time to your craft on the weekends. Stick to this even if things are going well and you are in flow. If you commit to setting and maintaining a time boundary around your craft when things are going well, it will be much easier to do it when things are not.

Create a joy list

Create a list of things that bring you joy outside of your chosen craft. If you get stuck, think back to when you were seven or eight years old. What did you enjoy doing then? What have you stopped doing that used to bring you joy? Use these questions to help you come up with your joy list, then commit thirty minutes each week to doing one thing from this list. Commit to this thirty minutes even when you feel you haven’t been “productive.” Commit to this list even when you don’t feel you are “deserving” of a break. Push past these stories that your brain will inevitably make up to make you feel like you are lazy, unproductive, and unworthy. Push past these stories and do it, anyway. The more you can commit to your joy list, the easier it will become and the more you will look forward to it.

If you feel comfortable, you can increase your joy time to one hour each week. But baby steps. Start with thirty minutes first and see how you feel.

Start a gratitude list

This may have elicited a major eye roll from some of you, but hear me out. There are multiple studies that confirm that writing a gratitude list can lead to lower stress levels and more positive emotions. Often when we are working toward a goal that feels far away, we have a tendency to forget all the things in our life that are going well. Writing a gratitude list, either in the morning or before bed, will remind you that even though you are working towards something in the future, you have many things in your life right now to be grateful for. It will give you some perspective and remind you to come back to the present.

Remember that a goal is a place to come from
This is a perspective shift that I learned from world-class coach Rich Litvin. He often says, “a goal is not a place to get to, but a place to come from.” Who do you need to become to achieve your goal? Who do you need to show up as today? Now be that person right now. The thing is, if you are burnt out and stressed trying to achieve your goal, that is who you will be when you get there. If you are depressed trying to achieve your goal, that is who you will be when you get there. Our future doesn’t exist–it is created by who we decide to be in the present and the steps we take in this moment. So, who do you need to be? Show up as that person right now.

Make a list of wins

Look back at your past wins. Everything you have ever accomplished was something that once seemed impossible and out of reach. But somehow you accomplished it. Write down these things and really think about how it felt when you accomplished them. Let it remind you that our goals often feel impossible until we achieve them. This will help you see that everything you imagine for yourself is much closer than you think. All you need is patience to get there. Make this list every time you feel anxious about your goal and tempted to drop all your needs for your craft.

Honour your needs

Every day, start your day by asking, “what do I need?” When we are laser-focused on a goal, we have a tendency to drop our needs in the process. We say things like, “I don’t need to eat now, I have to practice.” Or, “if I can just finish this piece now, I can meditate later.” I challenge you to start with your needs and attend to your craft after. Keep asking yourself what you need and make sure you are honouring it. Make it a point to honour your needs first, and attend to your craft later. I promise you that coming from this place will make the time you spend with your craft more worth it.

The bottom line

Learning to set boundaries around our craft can be difficult, because of years of programming and limiting beliefs around the need to be “productive.” By allowing yourself to set healthy boundaries around your passions, you will have a more fulfilling and long-lasting career.

More By Crystal Nicholls:

What to Do When You’ve Lost Your Love of Performing

What Performers Need to Know about Seasonal Affective Disorder