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Have you ever shared a thought before you’ve had a chance to process it yourself?
Testing the waters, you float the idea to friends or family hoping they’ll get on board, and if they don’t, you second guess yourself wondering if you were just being silly or selfish for even thinking it in the first place. (And so maybe, based on those thoughts and the story you are telling yourself about those thoughts) you decide not to rock the boat, convincing yourself that it is better to suppress your thoughts than to make any waves.
So, you bottle it up and toss it away into the sea of unprocessed ideas and move on with the more predictable, familiar terrain of life as you know it.
OR….on the other hand…what if they DO get on board with your idea right away? A sudden current of affirmation washes over you, and, buoyed by their support, you ride the wave of enthusiasm, eager to impress.
The course has been clearly mapped out for you. Charted by the opinions of well meaning friends and family. And you show up as expected, arriving at all the scheduled ports of call on time.
Remember that little idea that you once felt DRAWN TOWARD? It has now grown into something you are being PUSHED INTO – without giving yourself the chance to consider why.
And it’s perfectly natural to want to feel championed by those we love. It’s an energy boost, a quick fix.
But at the end of the day…or road…or journey, there’s only you – because THEY aren’t actually connected to the thing YOU wanted to do, they’ve tied it to what matters to them.
So when you arrive at the destination, the one where you thought you wanted to go, you feel like a castaway stranded on a desert island trying to remember why you even wanted to go there in the first place. Where is everyone?
They’ve moved on. They’re good!
The momentum of external validation is unsustainable until we understand why things matter to us.
So next time you are drawn toward a thought or idea, spend some time getting to know it, and exploring why it’s important to you BEFORE you spill it out or bottle it up.
Your thoughts are there for a reason and when you take the time to explore what they signify, you can take the helm and navigate your own course.
I’m Lisa Hopkins thanks for listening. Stay safe and healthy everyone and remember – to live in the moment.
Published in Collaboration with:
Hitchhiking for New Rules of Thumb
Lisa is an ICF Certified Professional Life Coach and Energy Leadership Master Practitioner at Wide Open Stages. She specializes in partnering with highly successful creative people who want to be challenged and inspired to become artists in all areas of their lives. A passionate creative professional herself, Lisa has over 25 years experience working in the performing arts industry as a director/choreographer, producer, writer and dance educator in NYC, nationally and internationally. She is dance faculty at Pace University NYC in the Commercial Dance and Musical Theater BFA programs, and is co-founder of New York Stage Originals, an internationally recognized theatrical production company. Lisa hosts the popular podcast STOPTIME: Live in the Moment and is founder of Wide Open Stages, where she coaches high-performing creatives in the performing arts industry.
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