Let’s Talk: So Your Friend Got A Better Gig Than You
Regardless of if you’ve met your peers at college studying the same thing or at a show, there’s a large portion of us out there that have friends who work in the same field as us. The catch is that when it comes to being involved in the arts and making relationships, sometimes your friends get bigger and better gigs than you – and you have to watch. Your Facebook is flooded with posts of “#blessed to announce I’ve been cast in ______” and “Here are my new headshots my dad paid for!” How do you deal with that? Do you?
You don’t, and that’s ok. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t support your friends in their success – but – that conversely doesn’t make their success your failure. My perspective is from an acting standpoint, so here’s an example: your friend who has no formal training (while you have a Bachelor’s degree in it) auditioned for a small-scale full-length film and got the part – whereas you can’t even fit in your schedule of your three jobs to go to any auditions. They’re texting you updates the whole time about how well it’s going, how they’re making friends with the director and how they might even be networking enough to get another part in another film in the works. Part of you is happy for them, sure, but that part is currently getting beaten up by the other part of you that has Mel Gibson’s Braveheart face paint on and is screaming a lot of words that aren’t appropriate to list. (Insert hoard of Scottish men shouting about freedom here)
This is the part where a lot of people would tell you, “Well, it sucks on your end but you should just get over it!” Not necessarily the case. The concept of “getting over it” implies that there’s something wrong. Instead, take that pang of jealousy you’re trying to hide and channel it instead of suffocating it. In this world and especially in this industry, there’s no shame in pulling motivation from wherever you can.
Better yourself without dragging others down. Use that little spark and nurse it into a flame so that you can better yourself. As the old saying goes, “Nothing good in life comes easy.”
Do some work through taking your jealousy and channelling it into amplifying your social media presence, networking and having the busiest day of your life squeezing an audition into the only spare 15 minutes you have. You’d be surprised at what you’re actually capable of.
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